Faithful. This year, I experienced the tangible faithfulness of God. If in the future, I ever complain of God’s lack of faithfulness, please remind me of the 2016-2017 school year as an incredible display of God’s faithfulness. I started the year off with no potential LTOs, only to have 5 consecutive ones this year – I got called in for a week long job on the first day of school that turned into 4 weeks. A few weeks later, I was serving at a church event which resulted in turning down interviews because I could not make it there in time, only to have two jobs offered to me 20 minutes later. Months later, I was turning into a prayer meeting as a vice principal called me to offer me a job until the end of the year. Through my lack of trust, my fear of man and my tendency to complain, God’s faithfulness remains steadfast. I know that my God is faithful, but what an incredible way to experience His faithfulness this year.
Servant. This word has been on my heart for the past couple of months, reminding me of what I should be, who I should strive to be like and the attitude I should have in serving others. But truly, this has been one of my greatest struggles – to serve without expecting anything in return, to serve the people that I do not like, to serve when I do not feel like it. I want to be a servant. I want to be a servant of God and a servant of others. Two words come into my mind – hospitality and humility. Both of which I am lacking… which brings me to my next word..
Pride. Pride today seems to be have a positive connotation and yet if you could hear my thoughts on a daily basis as I drive in the car, it would not only encompass pride, but impatience, anger and likely hatred. I hope no one soon acquires the superpower of reading people’s minds, because i would have zero friends. This year, there have been times when pride has been flashing in large red letters as if warning me to not let it interfere with my relationships, my attitude, my job. And yet more often that that, it has been more like a check engine light, warning me that something needs to change and yet I procrastinate or tell myself that it can wait, there are other pressing issues to deal with. Pride – God has given me a reality check this year. I am scared to ask for God to humble me, because… I have… and well, he does. God has made my pride evident to me this year. And I am not proud of it… ha.
Perseverance. I struggled with choosing this last word. Because unlike the last, this year has been hard. I did not enjoy every day at work, and my various jobs were met with quite unique challenges. Yes, it might have taken perseverance to go to work every day, whatever. But more than that it took perseverance for me to open my bible in the morning and read the Word… even when I did not feel like it. I went through a little bit of a dry spell… when I wasn’t feeling the Lord, and my reading was simply routine. In fact, I am still slowly trying to climb up, I want to be at a place when I am in love with the word again, and looking forward to my time with Him, rather than viewing it as a chore. I want to pray out of necessity not just out of want. Continuing to persevere in prayer and in His word has been one of the most difficult challenges this year and still continues to be.