“She is a Fat Ketchup” , he said under his breath as he covered his face with a newsletter, embarrassed that he was saying such a foul, mean phrase. “Fat ketchup” a student beside him repeated, unaware of the shame that the other student was feeling. Fat ketchup – meant as an insult, meant to hurt and meant to indicate the anger, the hurt and the pain that he was feeling. The worst insult that he could come up with at the time, and he meant every word. He didn’t deserve the yelling or the screaming, the insults or the harsh tone. His words were a direct consequence of the bullying and the hurt that he was feeling.
I have had a heavy week this week. I have seen the impact of an insult on a child, the result of a harsh tone on another human being. I have listened and experienced an intense battle between flesh and spirit. I have witnessed the outcome and sadness of an undeserved punishment. I have seen the look of pain effected by an insult filled with lies. And I have felt the drain of a negative attitude of another. I feel heavy, tired, sad and angry.
There was a cowardice that I felt this week, a feeling of insecurity, a helpless feeling of not being able to do enough. Was I able to sacrifice my own comfort? Am I able to fear God more than I fear man? Am I willing to battle and face strife daily rather than watch others suffer? I am convicted, but not convinced, perhaps because of the battle occurring the spirit and my flesh. I know i am sounding obscure, confusing even. But really, it is quite simple. It is the war between good and evil. A war, more than a battle, a war that needs strategy. A strategy that begins with prayer.
On Monday night, I prayed about it. On Tuesday, tears were entered into the equation, along with my small group who fought and encouraged me through with prayer. On Wednesday, there were results, grace-ful results, and it was only by the work of the Lord through the power of prayer. Later that night, my heart was heavy, heavy because someone was hurting, and I couldn’t do anything about it. All I could do was pray. Then I realized, that I could PRAY – and what an amazing power that is. That is the best thing I can do, that is more than anything I could have ever done on my own.
To whoever is feeling hurt or betrayed, bullied or insulted.
Please know how dearly loved you are. I hope that you tell someone, not so that they can stand up for you, or put a stop to it, but so that they can pray for you. There is only One that can heal, and that can change hearts. One that can eliminate evil and bring about justice. And that One is the Lord, Jesus Christ. He has the power. So allow Him to work, allow for His love to conquer, in the same way that is has conquered death and Sin.
Do not give in to the power of negativity, hurtful words or insults. Give power and praise to the One that it is due. There is saving power in the Word of God, power in the name of Jesus. This is the power that has gotten me through this week, that has allowed me to rejoice and give thanks despite the circumstances. This world sucks. There is something better coming. Meditate on His promises, on His word, it is truth after all. See yourself in the way that God sees you.
He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds. He determines the number of the stars, he gives to all of them their names. Great is our Lord and abundant in power, His understanding is beyond measure. The Lord lifts up the humble; he casts the wicked to the ground – Psalm 147:3-6
This song has been such a weapon, a sword if you will in these past couple of weeks. I hope that it encourages you.
I know who goes before me, I know who stands behind. The God of Angel Armies, is always by my side. Whom shall I fear?